The Distance Decade

by Cesar Alvarez

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1.
The Distance Decade I can look into the past, but there's not a moment I'd take back, always jumping into the deep end of what often felt like the ocean. I put myself to the test by taking on many endless quests, chasing knowledge, new worlds, love, I journeyed into the unknown. But I always found that I was never alone, no matter how far off the road. Here's to exposing our hearts by wearing them on our sleeves and discovering just who we really are. Here's to never turning back and discarding things we were supposed to believe. Here's to you and me. I learned there was clarity in a little spontaneity, took a one-way flight once to heartache city. 'Cause I was never one to believe in restricting possibilities, with time you find out if it's wrong or meant to be. Seeing lights, losing touch, falling down, getting up. But I always found that I was never alone, no matter how far off the road. Here's to exposing our hearts by wearing them on our sleeves and discovering just who we really are. Here's to never turning back and discarding things we were supposed to believe. Here's to you and me. Here's to exposing our hearts by wearing them on our sleeves and discovering just who we really are.
2.
You Sing Lead, I’ll Do the Harmony Early morning, cold December, I took the shortcut this time. Watched my breath cloud my sight as I waited for the train underneath an open sky waiting for sunlight. Patience through transport switches, shivering before these gallant wings. Initiate my transfer through the door to familiar eyes on a flawless face as I realize that some things in life are worth waiting for. And that last night we were singing about how we both carry the mark of the dark side, how we’re not ashamed to say those two words, and how you’re not afraid of me leaving. The sad part was that we knew I was leaving. Time won’t stand still yet memories return and constantly repeat. If I would have known that the dam would flow I would have said: “Don’t wake me, please. Don’t wake me, I don’t want to go.” And that last night we were singing about how we both carry the mark of the dark side, how we’re not ashamed to say those two words, and how you’re not afraid of me leaving. The sad part was that we knew I was leaving. Don’t mind me, you go ahead and sing lead. I want to do the harmony. But I still want to believe that one day we’ll be singing about how we both carry the mark of the dark side, how we’re not ashamed to say those two words, and how you’re not afraid of me leaving. We’ll spend the whole night singing because this time I won’t be leaving.
3.
So Tell Me 03:52
So Tell Me Waking up, it's a new day three thousand miles away from all I've ever known, but it's not the first time on my own. And I'm looking forward to making memories here without you despite the years that we invested, after all, this is my town too. And when you told me about the kind things he did for you I knew that something wasn't right but didn't want to start a fight so I found the proof and that's when I said: I think it's time you tell the truth, (no sense in hiding anymore), I won't stand by and waste my youth, (no more, no more), No need extending any longer (no), These broken promises that won't be honored. So tell me, so tell me the truth this evening. I'm gonna see the city and take the late train in. Gonna fly home to California and spend a few days with my friends. And if they ask me what happened and why I'm not with you, I'll tell them something wasn't right but didn't want to start a fight so I found the proof and that's when I said: I think it's time you tell the truth, (no sense in hiding anymore), I won't stand by and waste my youth, (no more, no more), No need extending any longer (no), These broken promises that won't be honored. Sometimes we find it hard to face reality when life goes on and love gets lost along the way. You could have said this wasn't what you thought it'd be, instead I found out that you'd moved on without telling me. But now I'm free, now I'm free. I think it's time you tell the truth, (no sense in hiding anymore), I won't stand by and waste my youth, (no more, no more), No need extending any longer (no), These broken promises that won't be honored. So tell me, so tell me the truth, I said, So tell me, so tell me, so tell me.
4.
Urban Deserts I want to see the orange lights of the Lincoln Tunnel flickering through the windows ‘round, then get to your door and call up to your room, so you could toss down your keys to let me in. We could spend the whole night like before, isolated away behind closed doors. If all the best moments of your life were like all the stars in the clearest of nights then I just tried to be one of the brightest among those myriad spheres of light. Will you remember to look up and find me? Will you remember me at all? The calm blue waters of your Arabian eyes made me believe that they’d continue hydrating my heart, at least for the meantime, ‘cause nothing lasts for long. But you can still walk through these urban deserts with me ‘til the earth rumbles and divides between us, pushing you east and pulling me west. If all the best moments of your life were like all the stars in the clearest of nights then I just tried to be one of the brightest among those myriad spheres of light. Will you remember to look up and find me? Will you remember me at all? Don’t walk away from me in fear… If all the best moments of your life were like all the stars in the clearest of nights then I just tried to be one of the brightest among those myriad spheres of light. If all the best moments of your life were like all the stars in the clearest of nights then I just wanted you to give me a chance to make a place for me in that sky. Will you remember to look up and find me? Will you remember me at all?
5.
Within Me 04:32
Within Me It’s hard to go on when you’re stuck where you don’t belong. As much as you try to fit in, you find yourself wearing thin. I stand all alone and I say out to the cold night air, I hope there’s an open or reserved place waiting for me elsewhere. Time never moves quick enough when you need it to. Instead it laughs in your face as it rolls on at a snail’s pace. So I close my eyes and put my head down to make time feel sorry for me. But I know too well, it has no sympathy. And I think to myself what the hell am I doing here? I should be out having a blast and making it last, but I’m not. I guess I could blame myself, but that wouldn’t be fair. It’s not my fault that there’s nothing to do, no one to see, nothing for me. I'm tired and worn. It's like a dull pain moving through my core keeping my will on the floor. I need some motivation, some inspiration, to get me out of this depressing situation, but this place sucked out that positive feeling and left me with this emptiness that resides within me. And I think to myself what the hell am I doing here? I should be out having a blast and making it last, but I’m not. I guess I could blame myself, but that wouldn’t be fair. It’s not my fault that there’s nothing to do, no one to see, nothing for me. I've got to believe it’s just a matter of time before I can see what’s waiting out there for me. I need some motivation, some inspiration, to get me out of this depressing situation, but this place sucked out that positive feeling and left me with this emptiness that resides within me. I need some motivation, some inspiration... (within me). And though this place sucked out that positive feeling, I know my time will arrive and until then I will be waiting patiently.
6.
The Things You Take Taking you where you’ll depart, I can’t let you go. Look at what you’ve done to me, you’ve run deep into my soul. And I know that there’s no sure guarantee, this won’t be easy, no. Then you walk away, I wish you could stay. I need you here by my side. But I will take on these lonely nights, I’ll be waiting for you. What can I do? You took my heart with you. Seeing your face in pictures of you, brings me your smile and helps me pull through. Remember the time that we sailed away to Mexico? And we felt so free, we could do anything. All of those times that we’ve shared, they never seem long enough to me, no. Then you walk away, I wish you could stay. I need you here by my side. But I will take on these lonely nights, I’ll be waiting for you. What can I do? You took my heart with you. And I just can’t wait to see you again to hold you. And I just can’t wait to see you again to kiss you. Look what you do to me. Counting the days until you will stay. I need you here by my side. But I will take on these lonely nights, I’ll be waiting for you. What can I do? You took my heart with you.
7.
90 Mile Light How did we get to where we are today, trying to force the pieces where they just don’t fit. Well, I can’t continue going on this way. I’m losing my mind over it. How many times must I try before I can get it right? I remember when the thought of you used to illuminate the road I drove when I would go see you and the mountaintops that towered around showed where I felt above the ground to take you like I had, but that 90 mile light is gone and it’s not coming back. It’s not coming back, no. I know you’ll think that I’m just giving up. And that this is just another battle we must win. But I can’t continue fighting every day. I’m losing my mind over it. How can you be beside me and still feel so out of reach? I remember when the thought of you used to illuminate the road I drove when I would go see you and the mountaintops that towered around showed where I felt above the ground to take you like I had, but that 90 mile light is gone and it’s not coming back. It’s not coming back. Reaching this point brings such hurt, but not all things that fade lose their worth, no. I remember when the thought of you used to illuminate the road I drove when I would go see you and the mountaintops that towered around showed where I felt above the ground to take you like I had, but that 90 mile light is gone and it’s not coming back. I gave you all that I had, but that 90 mile light is gone and it’s not coming back.
8.
If You Change Your Mind If only I could somehow change your mind so you’ll no longer fear and want to hide, buried deep within the walls you built throughout your life that keep you holding all the pain inside. But the only one who can decide is you. Divided by culture and divided by where we stand, but joined by flesh and blood just like the rest who walk this earth. I’m sorry being myself made you hurt, but there’s no point in running from the truth. There will come a day when everything will fade and the last thing left to take away will be the memories that you made, and you’ll look for the times we never shared, but if you change your mind just know you’ll find I will be there. See, I believe there’s no honor in filling you with lies. You might just understand if you would try, ‘cause there’s no point in running from the truth. No, there’s no point in running from the truth. There will come a day when everything will fade and the last thing left to take away will be the memories that you made, and you’ll look for the times we never shared, but if you change your mind just know you’ll find I will be there. You might be surprised with the courage you might find inside of you. And you might be surprised with the peace that you might find if you change your mind. There will come a day when everything will fade and the last thing left to take away will be the memories that you made, and you’ll look for the times we never shared, wondering what became of all those years. It’s not too late to drop that cross you bear, ‘cause if you change your mind just know you’ll find I will be there.
9.
Sleeping 03:57
Sleeping I turn to my side as I open up my eyes, hoping I’ll see your silhouette in front of me. Were you here at all? Will I hear footsteps down the hall? But no one’s there. And I know I should get up ‘cause I’ve laid here long enough to think. Was it just a dream that you were right here sleeping next to me, in our bed at home, the sheets feel so warm, but then I wake up alone. I reach for the telephone as the only means to feel you breathing close to me. We can talk all day and forget you’ve gone away every day. But how long is enough before I feel your touch again? Was it just a dream that you were right here sleeping next to me, in our bed at home, the sheets feel so warm, but then I wake up alone. I wake up alone. I don’t want to spend another day wandering the empty space where you once stood. I just want to hold you here at night and live our lives the way we said we would. Was it just a dream that you were right here sleeping next to me, in our bed at home, the sheets feel so warm, but then I wake up alone. I can’t take waiting, I need you right here sleeping next to me. But now those days are gone, today you’re here to stay. Tonight when I go to sleep, you’ll be here with me.
10.
This Island 05:31
This Island This island, so desolate and gray. Its sky forms pompous clouds that never care to open and the only sounds invading ears are defined by the mechanical rise and recession of moon-inflicted ocean waves. Watch the water saturate the sand and quickly fade away, much like the encasement of a spirit that has chosen to decay. Two ships lay docked displaying their grandeur. I’m captured by their appearances, yet tied down by indecision. One holds my place for I cannot board both. I have witnessed the meaningful hopes of one and the other’s promises of treasure and gold. Still I remain bound to this island, weak from its simple inebriating hold. Retreat to my cave, a settlement embraced by those before me. Markings remain affirming past residence. The echoes they once made seem preserved within these walls, whispering notions of guidance providing comfort for bonds broken apart. Oh voices of reason, renew this man, renew this dying heart! I can hear the captains calling out now, they’re lifting up the anchors. Accelerating pulse, no thoughts left to think and no time left to try. Eyes pinpoint target, legs start to react. I’m abandoning this island of fear and doubt. A decision has been made, no need to debate. The night approaches and my ship awaits.
11.
Las cosas que te llevas (The Things You Take, Spanish Version) Hoy me despido de ti. Ya te vas de aquí. Ahora sigue el dolor que viene con el amor, y yo sé que este tiempo sin ti no va a ser fácil, no. Yo voy a lograr hacerte quedar. Te quiero aquí junto a mí. Y yo pasaré estas noches sin ti, Yo te esperaré. ¿Qué puedo hacer? Te fuiste con mi corazón. Sonrisas tuyas llegan a mí viendo fotos que tengo de ti. ¿Recuerdas el viaje que hicimos a México? Y nos sentimos libres allá por fin. Todo ese tiempo vivido no es suficiente para mí, no. Yo voy a lograr hacerte quedar. Te quiero aquí junto a mí. Y yo pasaré estas noches sin ti, Yo te esperaré. ¿Qué puedo hacer? Te fuiste con mi corazón. Y no pienso más que en volverte a ver y abrazarte. Y no pienso más que en volverte a ver y besarte. ¿Qué has hecho de mí? Ahora a contar los días pasar. Te quiero aquí junto a mí. Y yo pasaré estas noches sin ti, Yo te esperaré. ¿Qué puedo hacer? Te fuiste con mi corazón.

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released May 21, 2012

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Cesar Alvarez Los Angeles, California

Cesar Alvarez is a songwriter based in Los Angeles, California. Blending emo rock with pop-punk, surf rock and blues, Cesar delivers a punchy assortment of power pop anthems driven by soaring guitars, catchy vocals, and heartfelt storytelling lyrics.

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